I am realizing that more and more of my problems are really the result of my own selfishness.
It’s just more fun blaming my frustrations on others. And, honestly, there are some people who really deserve it.
Just today I was standing in line at Country Fair—to satisfy my dependency on Pepsi. Someone decided that the line of ten people waiting for the next available cashier didn’t exist. Instead, he walked straight to the front of the line—ahead of everyone who was patiently waiting (maybe not patiently…).
Or hunting season. Last year was a rough season for me. I hunted way too much with way too little results. But, opening day of rifle season brought a new frustration.
I sat in my stand ALL DAY. I sat down an hour before light. I had seen a few deer, but nothing legal. They day wore on. Morning turned to late afternoon. I had just seen a few doe and a small buck, and I was beginning to get excited. At 4 pm I heard rustling behind me. I slowly turned to look. I waited and watched. Finally, I saw it. It wasn’t the monster buck I had been dreaming of. Instead, a man in orange came moseying up the trail. He stopped by my stand to talk—it was the neighbor. I kindly expressed that I had been sitting there all day, and I thought he would take the hint and go back toward his property. Instead, he proceeded to walk up the same trail that the last few deer had come down on. It was only about an hour before dark, but my hunt was practically over. If any deer were coming—they had been scared off.
As you can see, small things can frustrate me quickly.
But these two issues are a great illustration of my selfishness.
I typically live my life with me at the center. I am king. Everyone else exists for my pleasure. The line-cutter, the hunt-wrecker, and the slow driver have no place in my world.
This is exactly why I am poorly equipped to be king. Jesus is good—I am not. Jesus wouldn’t get ticked at the line-cutter—He made that man. Jesus wouldn’t be fuming over the hunt-wrecker—He died to redeem that man. He desires to pull both those men into His Kingdom, while I desire to get both of them out of my world.
I am thankful that my King is good, and I am thankful that He is changing me to be good.
Give me Your eyes for just one second, give me Your eyes so I can see,
Everything that I keep missing, give me Your love for humanity,
Give me Your arms for the broken-hearted—the ones that are far beyond my reach,
Give me Your heart for the ones forgotten. Give me Your eyes so I can see.